Cole Slaw Product Idea
I want to start a company that manufactures dishwasher-safe ceramic sculptures that look and can be served exactly like diner cole slaw. Ninety percent of the people on earth would never notice the difference and the other ten percent CAN BITE ME.
Name someone whose favorite food is cole slaw? When was the last time you went home and settled in to watch a good movie with a big ol’ bowl of cole slaw?
Not only does wasting cole slaw promote terrorism by contributing to the depletion of our nation’s Strategic Cole Slaw and Mayonnaise preserve, it’s just bad manners.
Plus, maybe we can ship off all the excess cole slaw to starving children in China. I hear they love that shit.
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Theory on why you should eat the rest of your food because there are starving kids in China
Let’s be serious now, Mom. If I don’t eat it, it’s not like you’re going to put it in a box and send it over to them are you? In fact, I think that’s exactly what we should do. I am obviously no longer hungry — but those people are fucking STARVING over there.
How can you be so cruel?
Let them eat the remainder of my Salisbury Steak Hungry Man dinner. Sure, I ate the apple pie square first. HEY! WHOA! Listen China, don’t get greedy.